weird is worth it

On the Hedge with Desire

Do you know that He’s always ahead of our needs?

Who? God. I believe that no one in this world knows my heart’s deepest desires but Him. And seeing the greatness of a Provider is not easy especially when I am on my ultimate ‘acquisition’ mode: I just really really really have to get what I want at the time that I want! But character can’t be honed that way. So I figured that I’ve got so much to learn and re-learn. And what better way to learn patience and how to surrender all my worries but through the littlest desires of my heart.

1. Notebook

At times, I can really be a stickler for details especially when it comes to pocket notebooks. I couldn’t leave home without them – yes, plural! The notebook I was looking for has to be light but thick enough for my daily dose of personal hullaballoo. I want it slim so I really don’t consider buying the ubiquitous spring type notebooks. I’ve visited quite a number of bookstores and I still could not find the ‘it’ notebook where I can put all my ideas and reflections other than this almost-perfect-one with the word “yeah” printed on each leaf.

But, you see, waiting and being patient will always be rewarded in the end. My sister whom I haven’t seen for a long time had the weekend off. I went to see her; after dinner, we went to her dormitory and as she was putting her stuff in place, she saw a plastic bag (it must have been stuck there for months!) and inside were two notebooks. Trumpets!!! She gave them to me — of course, for free! 🙂

2. Food

There will always be that time where one has to work on lunch breaks — as for me, that moment came and too bad, that I was really famished! I couldn’t leave my workstation even for hunger’s sake. Then came a good samaritan who gave me half of her food. That did put an end to my conquest in search of a good reason why I’m surrounded by good people– they are created so they can share their delicious tuna sandwich with me! 🙂

3. External Hard Drive

It was not a good day for machinal pranks! My temperament was put to a difficult EQ test when our office hard drive, where all the video materials to be used for editing were saved, won’t work on any of the Mac computers in our editing bay. I think by now that hard drive has its technical, antique value given its dilapidated case and unpredictable mood swings.

Gracefully, calmly, I first delighted on the possibility that I have to work again from scratch in the event the hard drive won’t mount on the other editing facility across our usual work station. I thought — acceptance in case things don’t go my way, grace to deal with it without spurting a contagious amount of irritability.

Ending: the hard drive worked on newer models of Mac. I was able to transfer all the video materials into a safer location! Whew! It’s a save!! 🙂

4. Time

Before, as I stepped on my ‘work zone’ and started checking my list of responsibilities, unwittingly, I was compelled to finish everything on one sitting. Instead of dividing my workload into smaller manageable tasks, I tend to abuse time and my body too. Rest and working 8 hours a day are a big no-no.

Until God changed my priorities.

I am grateful that I’m given the rare opportunity to finish my work load within 8 hours. I am grateful that I don’t have to work overtime on a regular basis; worse, on weekends — not just because I’m not getting paid for it, but it has also given me time to bond with my family. I also get to have my quiet time with God, reflect, read books, blog, and have weekly night outs with my sister and friends.

“For the person for whom small things do not exist, the great is not great.”

Jose Ortega y  Gaset


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