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Archive for the tag “Psalms”

Moon and Stars

I did something crazy. In fact, for a woman it’s an upshot of desperation and foolishness combined. It’s a mixture of not being able to stay still and my unbelief on the power and sovereignty of God. So let’s just leave it at that–I did something crazy, desperate, and stupid.

I would like to draw some inspiration from the story of Abram in Genesis 12. Abram feared for his life, so he asked his wife, Sarai to tell the people of Egypt that she is instead his sister.  To preserve his life, he was willing to sacrifice his wife. I did the same thing to someone. I lied so I can escape further humiliation and embarrassment.

I wouldn’t know how my lies had ruined God’s good plans. I fear for its repercussions. Will I suffer the same fate as that of Abram and Lot, and Abram and Hagar? How much of what I did would spiral out of control? Well, just as I finished typing the last letter of the last word of that last sentence, I knew the answer is not as important as knowing that God is in control and that His ways are higher than my ways. My friend, as she patiently peruses through my rambling messages on Facebook, wisely summed it up with this verse from Psalm 139:16Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

God will never run out of love, grace, and mercy, and they are all there for the taking. I was a bit resolute to go for a short run today at the park, so I went. I was positive that running will somehow get my mind off my messes and fears. And by God’s amazing grace, under the pale light burst of the unusually big moon set on the dusty Manila sky, He reminded me of that special scene where God took Abram outside and said to him, “Look up at the sky and count the stars—if indeed you can count them.” Then he said to him, “So shall your offspring be.” (Genesis 15:5) 

Just 3 chapters away from whence Abram took a detour and lied about Sarai being his wife and yet God, full of grace and mercy, still chose Abram to bear and experience His amazing love and promises.

The moon, the landscape, the lights, Oh! they were so magical and mysterious and awesome, just like God’s promises for me. I know He will keep His word in spite of what I’ve done. There is no condemnation in Jesus. I know He’s not finished yet. More good is yet to come.

 

Shame, the Condemning Teacher

There’s this friend that I haven’t seen for a very long time. I couldn’t even remember the last time I spoke to her, until one night she called me and we had the best conversation, talking about mistakes and how God has been teaching us the value of humility.

I never knew that God can use my pain from the past and the shame caused by my arrogance to reconnect with a long lost friend. Years ago, I experienced rejection after rejection. I jumped from one job to another.

No job was good enough for me. I blamed everyone for everything. I quit anytime I want even if it meant causing my company trouble. I just didn’t care.I’m good at what I do. That’s all that matters, I told myself. It was only a matter of time ’til the consequences of having a proud attitude found me at my weakest point.

I wish I didn’t have to go through it all. I wish I listened to my parents and saved myself the disgrace and pain of being kicked out of a job. I wish I had corrected my attitude earlier. I wish I didn’t gone far out from God. But the amazing thing is, God can use my pain to connect and minister to others, who are going through the same thing.

It is only by God’s grace that my experience can also serve as a warning plan to teach others not to go through the same mistakes. I haven’t had a talk like that with my friend since we became friends. But I trust that by the time we hung up the phone, she knew that she has a friend to whom she can confide with without any fear of judgment and condemnation.

I pray that through my story, she will also learn that God loves those whom he disciplines and that brokenness is not the end but a start to discover and emulate the humility displayed by Jesus Christ.

A broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not ignore. Psalm 51:17

When the soul has laid down its fault at the feet of God, it feels as though it had wings. -Eugenie de Guerin

Coincidence?? …

Coincidence??

You may find a deeper meaning to US’ Emergency number 911 after reading Psalms 91:11, which says,

“For He will order his angels to protect you wherever you go.”

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